Domestic Abuse is not always physical as people would suspect.
Controlling and Coercive Behaviour now forms a large part of Domestic Violence which can now be actioned through Police Involvement.
There is a growing awareness around the signs of coercive control – the emotional and psychological abuse of a partner, through threats and restrictions, as well as physical violence. .
A new law was made on coercive control, which was introduced at the end of 2015, after a Home Office consultation – and can carry a jail term of up to five years. The law – which has been praised by domestic charities – can help victims achieve justice and will hopefully instigate cultural change around this lesser-known side of domestic abuse. Although it was only used five times between December 2015 and March 2016, there are now signs that emotionally abusive behaviour is being recognised and taken seriously.
It’s more than just one argument
Emotional abuse happens over a sustained period of time, where the perpetrator repeatedly controls their victim.
When we are talk about domestic violence it’s not the case that one argument crosses the line and it becomes an abusive relationship It’s a pattern in the relationship, where one partner is controlling and there’s an ongoing sense of fear.
An abuser wants to scare their victim
With domestic violence, partners behave in a way that’s designed to intimidate, frighten or coerce their victim’s behaviour
When a victim is frightened of their partner and treads on eggshells out of fear of their reaction, that’s a problem.
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It’s abuse if you feel frightened of your partner and you’re worrying about the consequences of what externally might be relatively minor things.
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If they get angry at the slightest thing.
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If you have to do everything their way.
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If you’re worried and feel like your behaviour will set them off’.
A one-way street
An abuser will not think about their partner, and generally puts themselves first.
Perpetrators of domestic violence do it because they feel entitled to behave that way. They think their partner is there to meet to their needs and they’re entitled to take whatever they want.